if there's one thing i do best, it's putting my future at stake. maybe i indulge and yearn too much to enjoy the pleasures of life now that i fail to give it foresight and think about the future. yes, i think that would be the case. unless otherwise stated, i think my priorities lie, not on succumbing to the society's norms, but to enjoy my days, just how I want it to be.

what do i want? that's very subjective and many would think it's not a feasible ideal. but what i really want at the end of the day is to settle down and lead a simple life. just having you by my side. it doesn't really matter how we get by, we surely will. I'll pick up some useless job, that doesn't require brainwork cause I do not like to use my brain, work like a slob, and maintain a neat and tidy cosy little home. i don't even mind living on candles at night.

What I really want in life, I've already found

you'd say what about your kids? you're not thinking for them!

and this is when i proceed to hurl myself at the closest wall that will break all my joints upon the impact of body knocking against wall, afterwhich the wall crumbles and succeessfully buries me. and by the time the rescue team reaches me underneath all that debris and dust, my body will be convulsing in shock and suffering from dehydration. in the ambulance i'll be hyperventilating, struggling to breathe from the oxygen mask while grimacing at it's rubbery plastic-ky odour leaving a bitter taste in my throat. and paramedics will be sticking needles into my skin, conscientiously missing the vein and poking into me over and over again till finally they get the right spot. maybe i'm thinking too much. i probably wouldn't be able to smell no shit or feel no shit. and finally i will give up the struggle and let myself go

Oh wow glory nice try. nice attempt AGAIN at predicting your eventual ending. Try harder next time. After-effects of too much channel newsasia updates of the yogyakata earthquake that reads 6.2 on the richter scale. Thousands and thousands of deaths.. so so terrible.

So you see at the end of the day, whatever you want you cannot achieve unless you're the richest person in the world. you've no choice you just got to do it. BOO HOO HOOOOOOO.

Upon saying that, glory continues to crunch on her blueberry morning. Bows to everyone and thanks them for spending 5 minutes on glory's incessant nonsensical fiddle-faddle.

"...you make the best decisions for yourself."


really?
sometimes i think i'm not exactly the best decision maker.
or at least, i'm not very good at implementing those decisions i make.
thus resulting in failure.
i need someone to hop in to scold me yell at me.
soft approaches don't work on me. give me bricks and stones.

i look back and smile at how we've been talking to each other on the phone daily from all the way back in sec4. 5 years you've lent me a listening ear, shared stories and jokes with me. 5 years of incessant chatter, wise advice (which i hardly ever heed to and therefore i should burn in hell forever and ever amen), laughter and tears. you've been there to catch every fall, although you probably created 10 000 of those "fall(s)". you've given me the support i've needed, and the strength i need to go on from day to day.



5 years - from friend to family.
i love you so much.
i could go on like this for another 5 years.
i wouldn't mind another 50.

i toss and turn, trying hard to fall asleep. i lie awake trying to keep my eyes shut. i try to take long breaths to relax but something (i wish i knew what) at the back of my head keeps me up.


i think the lights are preventing me from sleeping. i climb out of bed to turn the night lights off. half an hr later, i think the darkness makes me nervous. i climb out again to turn them on.


how should i sleep? maybe i should sleep face up. no wait, this doesn't feel comfortable. let's try turning to the right. no wait, this doesn't feel right either. what if there's something behind my back which i can't see? okay. maybe let's try turning my back to the wall - ahh.. this way i won't be afraid! no wait, i still can't fall asleep.


maybe i should bring out my notes to read. that should put me to sleep. no wait, i should sleep and leave everything else till tomorrow. no maybe i shld just climb out of bed to study since i can't fall asleep. no!!! i need to sleep now or you won't have the energy to study tomorrow.


thoughts like these leave me sleepless.




hoho. something to make me grin about. someone brought me my fav. century egg porridge at 11+ in the night, all the way from geylang. *heart melts* oh! oh! and it gives me a warm fuzzy to know that the journey from geylang to my place took 2 hours.
now everyone, say "awwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwww..."

back to swimming daily. back to waking up to see your face. back to tugging at your hair and attempting to push u off my bed. back to seeing you for more than 12 hrs a day. back to saying goodbye to you, only to see you one and a half hours later.
:D
we shall find our momentum again!


swim, run, EAT junk food, worm, lalalaylaylolo - the best things in life.

back to swimming daily. back to waking up to see your face. back to tugging at your hair and attempting to push u off my bed. back to seeing you for more than 12 hrs a day. back to saying goodbye to you, only to see you one and a half hours later.
:D
we shall find our momentum again!


swim, run, EAT junk food, worm, lalalaylaylolo - the best things in life.

you wake up one morning, after a terrible night, fish for your color pencils and start doodling on a blank piece of paper like a pre-school kid.

don't you feel happier already.

NO MORE DRINKS!
no.. no more!!!

i have once again successfully screwed up my job as a student today, working towards my failure through the negligence of books notes pens and papers. i feel hopeless but it's not like anyone can help me if i don't help myself.
i just can't bring myself to READ anything except material irrelevant to my following three papers. i find myself absorbed in books magazines newspapers websites... i even read everything on TELETEXT. i press on the remote.. digit after digit and wait for articles to flash on the screen. MAGAZINES; i read from back to back.. i could probably give u a summary of any article in those magazines as well.
it's okay... i shall find hope in tomorrow :p


swimming today! i simply love the smell of chlorine in my hair. i love the familiar faces. i think i like consistency in things. things that never change. things that remain the same. repetitive things. things that go on and on and on. i can listen to a single song over and over and over again for over an hour. apple + worm can vouch for that.


but then again, maybe not. i swing from doing one thing to the other.
now, that's not consistent.
ahahaha. i confuse myself.

i tried so hard. i did everything.

and now, 12 hours before, i give up.
i'm so disappointed in myself.

WHAT WENT WRONG?!?!?!

the guy in the next block has a bloody yummy body. and it doesn't help when he's half naked at home TEE HEE HEE.
like slurps.
eye candy from out your window. how fortunate. :D

to all those precious friends taking who have papers to sit for tomorrow,
Maths1 in the morning: STARfernee + flalala + vivis + jasmineXINGHAO + quin
and Maths2 in the afternoon: flaylaylay + flululu
all the best. hugs you all tightly.




i miss shinnie love-can
i miss floating in the pool
i miss the adrenaline rush of non-stop laps with hippo white cap, gold cap, and blue cap.
i miss giggling at the way 'mr. miyagi' swims, with his head bobbing up and down in the most ridiculous way
i miss staring at jason's cute butt (dear, your's cuter. don't jealous)
i miss the residual chlorine smell on my hair, which to one point in time just stayed fixed on me no matter how many times i shampoo-ed.
i miss the sunshine on my back.
i miss the red flush sunburn on my cheeks. (BUT NO SHINNIE NO CHANCE I WILL GIVE UP BEING FAIR)
i miss laughing at baboon when i catch him tanning on saturday mornings at the pool


i miss snuffanie and blyan and stan
and for bryan, hip hip hooray again! ur papers are over just when i started mine.
i miss drinking coffee and laughing at all their idiotic lameass no-brainer jokes
i miss going "WAH LAU BRYAN!! WHERE GOT HOT LOR PLS!"
and i miss looking at snuffanie and saying... "steph i want to eat cheesecake ley" for consecutive days, but never really eat it in the end.

hello my lovelies!

i'm up and waiting for Love to swing by, to come on over with a great big hug and a light peck on my nose. it's a good feeling to have; this sleeping early and waking up early, and feeling astoundingly pleased with everything and everyone around you who matter to you. you sit on your couch, staring out of your window into the plain blue sky, splattered with white fluffy clouds and feeling the heat of the morning sun, while munching on your cereal drenched in cold milk. you dig on your cereal and pick for all the nuts and berries first, and laugh at yourself for being such a kid at 21.

God speaks to you in the most wondrous and unexpected ways. you wake up one morning, slip into your daily brainless routine of blog-hopping and laugh at the uncanny activities of your kuku friends, or read about the happenings of strangers in your life whom you've religiously kept an update of through the e-world. and then you chance upon that one bible verse which was once so familiar and close to your heart. one which once granted you comfort in moments of dire distress.

'Be careful for nothing; but in everything by prayer and supplication with thanksgiving let your requests be made known unto God.
And the peace of God which passeth all undersanding, shall keep your hearts and minds through Jesus Christ' -Philippians 4: 6 - 7

and that same verse has yet again eased my troubled soul.
people, irregardless of how nice and loving they are, no matter how close they are to you, will let you down in more ways than you can imagine, even though they may not necessarily mean so. but God never fails to stand by your side and walk you through, just as He said He would.
indeed He is just a prayer away.

just moments before you stepped into the exam hall the day before, you see a small group of 4, gathered together to have a word with God. and you wonder what happened to that ferventness of yours. He didn't fail you, yet you chose to forget Him for the pleasures of the world.

i am such a slob. i don't want to study anymore. it's like a helpless situation on my side. heh.

many loves to my dearest who bought pen refills for my exams starting tuesday. such a sweetie. MUAH!

for all the food i stuffed into my mouth today, i should really die. apple's pasta my dad's fried rice chips ahoy cookies and twisties. *shakes head*


my dearest is back from taiwan. i am overjoyed. (:

and check out the things that exist in taiwan.. buahahaha..

iFuck anyone? LOL...

Glowy; Flolo; C6661 - oh my baby guchi guchi. says:
my friends and i have new names
Glowy; Flolo; C6661 - oh my baby guchi guchi. says:
from glory elaine apple eunice
Glowy; Flolo; C6661 - oh my baby guchi guchi. says:
we became flory flaine fapple funice
Glowy; Flolo; C6661 - oh my baby guchi guchi. says:
then we became
Glowy; Flolo; C6661 - oh my baby guchi guchi. says:
flolo flaylay flala and flulu
Glowy; Flolo; C6661 - oh my baby guchi guchi. says:
now we are
Glowy; Flolo; C6661 - oh my baby guchi guchi. says:
toot tootsie tootie and tutu
To everyone i told i will never... I'm sorry, i lied. says:
dumb dumber dumberer and dumbest? =x
Glowy; Flolo; C6661 - oh my baby guchi guchi. says:
WAHAHAHAHAAHAH
Glowy; Flolo; C6661 - oh my baby guchi guchi. says:
oh well..
Glowy; Flolo; C6661 - oh my baby guchi guchi. says:
we all know who's the dumbest

i was running like a mad cow with mo today. an attempt to make up for the sinful indulgence in junk junk and more junk over the past two nights. twisties chocolates cheezels macs and baker's inn cakes. oh my god. i'm ashamed of myself. *looks down at spare tyres and thunder thighs*
zip zap he's gonna be back. how wonderful life is. (((:
okay and he's gonna come back to a big fat buldge. frowns. maybe i should do more running tomorrow.