many of us think before we speak. and in a fit of anger, we ramble things which we never thought we'd say. after that, we regret it, and we feel so terrible inside, but there's really no way to take those words back. hmms. just some random thought. i don't even know why i'm saying this. sigh.

anita mui died this morning. sigh.. just when i left hongkong, she died. if only i stayed in hongkong for a longer period of time, she'd have lived longer. see, the power of my presence.... people live on it...i'm lyk oxygen. how great i am... sigh...my departure from hongkong has brought tears to many. sighh... how sad.. sigh.. SIGH.... *shakes head*

first day back home and i'm laughing all over

darlings, i'm home! says:
i'm NOT LAZY!darlings, i'm home! says:
i love $$
darlings, i'm home! says:
hahahas
=QuInnnNnNnnn= says:
hahahahha
i miss you gorgeous babes hoho~ says:
me tooooooo
i miss you gorgeous babes hoho~ says:
the i love $$ part
MEET AT JJ.... GO COUNTDOWN... *damai misses her babeSSS* says:
ahahahahaha
darlings, i'm home! says:
ahahhas.
darlings, i'm home! says:
i need a money tree
darlings, i'm home! says:
let's build money tree together k
darlings, i'm home! says:
then we can all take money frm the money tree
darlings, i'm home! says:
wheee
MEET AT JJ.... GO COUNTDOWN... *damai misses her babeSSS* says:
i'm in this mannnnn
MEET AT JJ.... GO COUNTDOWN... *damai misses her babeSSS* says:
ahahahahaha
darlings, i'm home! says:
ok SEt!
i miss you gorgeous babes hoho~ says:
-raises hands- im all for it
darlings, i'm home! says:
sciece students go create fomula for money tree
darlings, i'm home! says:
me and quin design the tree
darlings, i'm home! says:
ahhhahas.
MEET AT JJ.... GO COUNTDOWN... *damai misses her babeSSS* says:
yup yup
MEET AT JJ.... GO COUNTDOWN... *damai misses her babeSSS* says:
i do e chem part
MEET AT JJ.... GO COUNTDOWN... *damai misses her babeSSS* says:
sd... PHYSICS
MEET AT JJ.... GO COUNTDOWN... *damai misses her babeSSS* says:
ahahaahahhaa
i miss you gorgeous babes hoho~ says:
physics???
i miss you gorgeous babes hoho~ says:
wahahhha
i miss you gorgeous babes hoho~ says:
glooory
i miss you gorgeous babes hoho~ says:
GEOGRAPHY
i miss you gorgeous babes hoho~ says:
wahahaha
darlings, i'm home! says:
ahahaha!!!
darlings, i'm home! says:
quin talk to the tree lar
i miss you gorgeous babes hoho~ says:
i help pluck the money
darlings, i'm home! says:
read poems to the teree
darlings, i'm home! says:
help it to grow
darlings, i'm home! says:
ahaha
=QuInnnNnNnnn= says:
hahhahhaah
=QuInnnNnNnnn= says:
Assssssssssssssss
i miss you gorgeous babes hoho~ says:
i help pluck theee moneyyy
=QuInnnNnNnnn= says:
i help t0 kip dem after tt
=QuInnnNnNnnn= says:
hahah
darlings, i'm home! says:
OK!
=QuInnnNnNnnn= says:
i'll read p0ems t0 e m0ney t0 tame dem
darlings, i'm home! says:
i help to USE THEM
darlings, i'm home! says:
ahahahhas
=QuInnnNnNnnn= says:
gaaahhahahahahaha
MEET AT JJ.... GO COUNTDOWN... *damai misses her babeSSS* says:
ahahahahaha
i miss you gorgeous babes hoho~ says:
to tame???
MEET AT JJ.... GO COUNTDOWN... *damai misses her babeSSS* says:
n finally... u'll need sunshine
MEET AT JJ.... GO COUNTDOWN... *damai misses her babeSSS* says:
tt's MEEEEEEEEEE
i miss you gorgeous babes hoho~ says:
its a wild plant??? RRRR
MEET AT JJ.... GO COUNTDOWN... *damai misses her babeSSS* says:
HO HO HO HO

so lame. ahahhaas

my luffed ones,
i'm back.
aside from all the shoppin fun,
i've missed everyone.
mmmm....


i'm tired,
& i need lotza slp...
coughin lyk nobody's business...
anymore and my lungs will fall out too.


it'll be awhile till i get to meet everyone though...cuz i hafta wait till my flu and cough goes away.
so till then,
happy new year.


i miss my hammy especially. *pouts*
o. and i'm going to buy a beagle. ho ho ho

before i leave for HK, i've got many things to say this christmas.
>
for all these people whom i love, thank you for loving me.


chongming
thank you for everything.


celest, shihan, gillian, claudia
God gave me four of you to keep me sane in jj. celest, for giving me advice, shihan for keeping me entertained, gillian, for being there for me when the whole world abandons me, and claudia, for your support and encouragement.


vivis
babe you mean so much to me. all the late night talks and disclosing of heheh deep dark secrets. your tolerance of my mood swings. mmm.. muacksie


touch babes
i never knew how much u all meant to me until the last chalet we had. celest for being celest *grin*. ezdi, it's been nice talking to you online...my HEROINE *cheers* nad, sweetie baby who's so lurrrving and true. momo for those times in the beginning of the year when i talked to you, and for looking after my little bundle of joy while i'm in HK. sunitha tao yen peg for being quiet and letting me feel noisy heh. damai...the girl with no pretense. quin...for being bubbly and cheerin pple up.


weili
darlin grandson u lend a listening ear when i'm down. u listen to my ramblings and grumbling. you're a great companion. i love you.


tianxin
all those mornings when i was tearing, you were there to make me smile. *hugZz*


chailee mummy
you're the one who remembers our birthdays. the one who sends us cards for christmas. you keep mjdds going on. *smiles*


bin, guang, puaygek
the three of you, often missin, but always there when i need you. cheers.


keatwee, huiyee, jia
you are sunshine in my life. not a word spoken, but the presence alone keeps me smiling inside.


ed.!
my wallow in self-pity partner, you keep me grinning when i'm down. (=


gimson
you still owe me coffee


yongxian, zhipeng
your company online while the first few days when chongming was gone meant alot to me.


angela baby
i love you.


mr. purple bear
thx for hugging me to sleep everynight. thx for making me feel better when i cry.

is this sms funny, or is it just me with psychotic tickles in my sides today?
=( ya rit. Aye. Til the day we mEET again, U tkc ya. ciaoz!
funny right? like, wahhh... i'm not going to see her until 10 years later. (wah if it's really like tt i'll cry i tnk)


oo.. i read bout sth interestin frm this certain gal's blog. it's interesting! aye, it made me laugh too.
you're supposed to draw circles in a clockwise direction with ur right foot,
and then draw the number 6 in the air with ur right hand.
ur foot will start drawing circles anticlockwise!
cow funny.


yet another funny dumb thing...
noVas> what do u call a fish with a big head and a small body
glooooory> ermmm..
glooooory> fish ball?
glooooory> ermmm..
noVas> wrong
noVas> hehe
glooooory> fish?!
noVas> yes
noVas> fish
glooooory> hahahahahhaha
noVas> 2 more chance
noVas> quick
noVas> guess
glooooory> ernnnnnn,,,,..
glooooory> luo han fish?
noVas> NO NO
noVas> wrONg
noVas> last chance
glooooory> ermmmm....
glooooory> fish dipperS?
noVas> No NO
noVas> hehe
noVas> hehe
noVas> i tell u the answer
noVas> 20 dollars
noVas> pls
glooooory> haha
glooooory> charge it to cm!
noVas> ok
noVas> the answer is:
noVas> ..................
noVas> excited?
noVas> hehe
noVas> wait
glooooory> wiating!!
noVas> the fish is an ikan bilis wearing a helmet


i keep blogging today. (the line breaks means different blogging times ya)
the bestfriend just called!!
O-V-E-R-J-O-Y-E-D.
hahhas.

sugar, spice, and everything nice.
<3

i miss being at the chalet with all the rest of them. i want to go back there to laugh and roll around...i want to play twister and get twisted...want to bbq on the ground and run around snapping photos...i just want to play so hard that my brains fall out and i stop thinking about missing my friends. right now, i'm feeling lonely. it's been like that since the tenth. december is a bad time of the month and oddly everything seems to happen around december. people having problems with people closest to them.

//today, your msgs made me tear.
i know my replies were chirpy,
but i also know tt -
you know i'm pretending

//andshe'sgonemissingagain.fuckyou,youdamnbitch.isitsohardtosparemeyourmiserablefivecentstojustfuckingreplytomymessages?isitsowrongtojustfuckingreply?tellme,whydoyoualwaysdothistome?whydoyougoawaywhenineedyouaround?whydoyouapologisewheneverythinghashappened,thewholeworldhastumbleddown,andi'minawreck,andyousaysorryfornotbeingaround.ihateyou.ireallydo.

just got back from touch chalet. totally shagged from all tt photo takin and laughing and water drinking (yikes). the second night was swt and peaceful (if not for the fuggin invasion of the roach). all the talks and updating... it's a nice feelin which i haven't felt for a lng time. seems like quite alot of things hv been happenng for all e touch girls. aie, boys suck. it was awhile ago when i remembered saying that i'd dis-associate myself from them after JC life is over but, after all that msn-ing n talks in touch chalet, aiee... i take back my words.
i don't know what to call them. do i treat them as my friends? or do i just treat them as teammates? when do u call a person a friend? is every person that has entered my life at some point of time considered a friend? why is it tt i make such a distinct effort to call my classmates, CLASSMATES. maybe my expectations for a Friend is too high. the touch girls.. are somehow more than just TEAMMATES. something in me wants to get to know them better... grrrrrrr... i'm so confused. i don't know what i'm driving at. i miss them. their chitter chatter, their talks their laughs their smiles and pouts. the thought of them sends a tinglish happy feelin down my throat. *smiles* friendships are much more confusing than relationships.
and to the point about relationships...i'm amused tt they find what c-eles-t says, to be very enlightening. the things ce-le-st says are all too familiar..something that everyone around me has been tackling with day in day out. why did it seem so new to them? haha... cute. i think they're just plain cute. not naive...just perhaps, not exposed enough YET. the world of emotions awaits them. i guess people learn as they go along. now now.. i sound old. bleahhhh....i'm not old!! so gl-ory!! STOP IT!!! grrrrrrrrrrrrr.

CHALET PHOTOSwhEeeee.......... hell a lot of photos. crazy gals... headache man

c-el-est-ina, you're GREAT?! my foot man!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
muahahhahhhahahhhahas..
newayz, was talkin to t-er-ence, and i showed him a touch photo..
and he said
"her hair used to be longer"
HAAAHAAAHAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!!!

oo! ce-les-t!!
1, boy has quit touch.
2, i'm not going to register SAT on thursday, i'm going on saturday. now, aren't you happy? lol.
3, i'm SWEET. and,
4, I WILL GET MARRIED NEXT YEAR!!! muagagaga..

met the best friend for approximately one hour today! *smileys*
1046hrs: phone call
1140hrs: 10minute cab ride to CMPB
1200hrs - 1700hrs: roaming around from ikea to queensway to ikea to anchorpoint to ikea to queensway while waiting for that stupid dumb friend
1700hrs - 1830hrs: sending army boy back to hendon camp
1830hrs to 2020hrs: GETTING BACK TO LAKESIDE FROM HENDON CAMP -______- (i swear i nearly died on the train)
2020hrs to 2200hrs: crapping with dear ce-le-stin-a at JP
that sums up the day.
chalet tmr! heh.

morbid. stagnant. that's the phase i'm trapped in now. it's not the toomuchtimebuttoolittlethingstodo blues. it's just that i miss the bestfriend so badly that i bump into him in LALA land even in my 15minute naps. summary: bad.
but on rethinking, this sudden temporal absence of the bestfriend isn't exactly all that bad. more interaction with others, more independance, and more self-reflection. life's not just about whining, complaining, and bickering anymore. i think before i talk, look before i walk, open my arms and reach out to people around. wiser, perhaps. more thoughtful too. mmmm.... summary: more appreciative.


MISSION: girl
still going on. not forgotten! heehee


4.46am. currently suffering from a linguistic lag. words aren't flowing (okay what's new).
things to do:
*the bestfriend's christmas present
*get my butt down to ikea
*Send chalet photos to cousin
*register for SAT
*take driving liscence
*wash clothes
*run
*disturb ce--les-t
*meet brend for breakfast date
*charge camera batteries
*get a job
*blade properly


yadda yadda yadda. i haven't been acting stupid since the absence of the bestfriend. c-eles-t! where are you? i want to act stupid and say stupid things. come out right now! hide no more! hey tickle tickle.. come out come out, wherever you are!


and yes, to find out where i've been my dear c-eles-t, click HERE

aie, cute rights? so cel-est, are u still so sure that you don't want to take care of it while i'm in hk??? hahaha

i'm,
tired of blogging.
i think.


a little gloom cloud hovers over me.

much to my utter dismay, they're going back to mar-der-fukkin JJC to play touch. *SULKS* i miss hearing em crap arnd (& touch) but no way am i going to take a 5-min bus ride to that school (note: hell-hole). *double SULKS*
//
going to ikea to hunt for materials for honeydummy's christmas present!! oo! i'm so excited! *blinks blinks*

this is what people who're not aslp at 3.55am in the morning do.
4am-ish, i'm crazy, missing my bestfriend, and feeling extremely whiny but there's no one for me to whine to.
---------> CLICK

played around with photoshop.
i think my photoshop skills are damn good
cuz my hair LOOKS REAL (right?)
and this is what i'd look WITH LONG HAIR!
fucking funny
//laughs and rolls all over

oh man... why did i make that freakin bet of 8 meals 2 cheesecakes 1 strawberry cake and $2...

i dreamt of my honeydummy!!!!
*bounces up and down*
I DREAMT OF MY HONEYDUMMY!!!!!!!!!
i'm so happy!! *smileys*
*blink blink*
hees.

i miss
*gege dear
*tt tall tall thin thin girl (boy?) with highlighted streaks and a rotten fila bag and a UGLY (but not rotten)blue fila bag
*the stupid cow who doesn't know how to answer the phone whenever i call her
*vi-vis
*stupid e-D.! i duno where the hell he is


i wanted to
*sleep at 10pm but someone said she's going to play gunbound with me after Charmed but she didn't in the end
*sleep at 11pm but it seems as if many memories/worries are painted on the eyelids of my eyes. i see them everytime i close my eyes
*go for a run in the afty but it was pouring cats and dogs
*wash mr. mouse mouse's house but i couldn't get my butt movin
*msg ko-h xia-o hu-i but i became too lazy to type the sms
*cry when i looked into the mirror and saw your reflection in my eyes. you're on the extreme end of singapore -whines
*go out with weilin at 9pm-ish but i realised i have no money at all


i dream of
*my gege appearing right in front of me this very moment
*capturing a rainbow in a cookie jar
*loving and being loved


i am
*irritated because nan-a-na sent this to my friendster account before going into ns
i know i'm not supposed to be talking to you
anymore, but yah, sorrie...
took quite a while to write this, but could only
finish it today. dun think it sounds nice, dunno
y i'm sending you. but if i don't now, i might
never get the chance again. dun haf a
title...dunno wat to call it. dun think i'll ever
give it one.

They say that if i love you,
i should let you go.
But what do they know?
That's just impossible to do.

I can say a thousand words,
I can tell you a million things.
But it still won't mean a thing,
if nobody's listening.

All my time spent thinking about you,
all my life wanting to love you,
i'll never regret.
Maybe it's not worth it.
Maybe i'm being a fool.
But tell me it's being done for you,
and i'll ask questions no more.

Ever since the first time i saw you,
till the very last second,
every image, sound, even smell
Will be forever kept inside me.

Sometimes i wonder if i'm hurting you.
Please tell me if i do.
Everything i've done's been done for you...
All i ever wanted was to see you smile...

Every word to you,
i fear it to be my last.
But things are out of my hands,
i can only tell you i love you.

All my time spent thinking about you,
all my life spent loving you,
i'll never regret.
I'm sure it is worth it.
Even though you might think me mad.
But tell me it's being done for you,
and i'll ask questions no more.

i've rejected u flat in the face 5? 6? times so why dun u just go away...yeah everybody loves you adores you thinks you're great. i know that too but the thing is, there's no feeling. what do you want me to say?? if i talk to you, they say i'm leading you on. if i don't talk to you, they say i'm mean. go to hell lar


i have to learn to
*be mushy (cm will know what i mean)
*be more demure and girlish
*stop crying
*cook


i need
*my gege dear
*lots of money
*a marie france bodyline slimming course
*an intensive skin(face) treatment programme
*Soo Kee jewellery's Brilliant Rose pendant

aie.. it's 3sth am!!
i'm DEAD TIRED but i can't sleep lest i fail to wake up by 6am to make a phonecall!!
GRrrrr.... help!

goped from bel-le


You are attracted to those who are unbridled, untrammeled, and free.

In the process of courtship, the approach that would make you feel irresistable is moods-swing, blow hot and cold in love, vacillate.

The impression you would like to give to your lover is stylish.

What you hate most in your partner is that the person is ruthless, cold-blooded, and/or ironic.

The kind of relationship you would like to build with your partner is that both of you can talk about everything and anything, no secret is kept.

You can never be stabilized; actually, you are not suitable for marriage and you don't want to make committment.

You always want to get married, but in fact, you don't even know what it really is.

At this moment, you don't want to be tied down by a steady relationship, you just want to flirt around.

outside she wore a grinning mask
inside she was crying


looking at the scars on her arms and legs
the hands scream yes
but the mind says no.


it's a sudden loneliness.


cry yourself to sleep baby girl.

swollen eye lids
blooshot eyes
tear-stained face
a soaked pillow
and a sunken heart.
you'll be gone tomorrow



i wonder when i'll see you again.
i wonder when i'll get another phonecall from you.


you mean so much to me. you're my precious jewel...my honeystars...this year has been a shade of grey. you've been that ray of sunshine that brings joy and hope. you've kept me going along this long and twisted road. no amount of ciggs and alcohol and running and plugging raging music in my ears can ever ever replace that one hug from you that lessens all that sadness. you're someone who's been through so much so much with me. u're my greatest friend.


i don't want you to go away
but santa wouldn't let you stay.
so here i am tearing and tearing the whole afternoon through.


i know a couple of months isn't alot
i know time will fly...
but..
it's just a weird feelin.





brother, i miss you.

back from the last dinner
went over to NYDC! haha. i'm ulu..first time eating there? yum yum...had a Mushroom Attack and it's nicey and yummy cause gl-ory LURVES mushroomies. (=
photos uploaded. they're HERE.
heehee

i like to think that everything will be alright after sleeping.

sometimes, it works. but more often than not, it doesn't. but i guess things tend to fade away somehow. it's all but a matter of time. at times i get so tired of everything, i just go to sleep and wake up, telling myself that there's no use brooding over it. nothing i say will change anything so why bother. a person can talk to me about the same issue on the night itself, and the very next morning, and find me saying completely different things about the incident...i'd sound perfectly fine, stable and composed. but am i really?


GR threw hurtful words at me again. i'm hurt. i teared, again. why do people always have to be so mean to me? it doesn't hurt to just keep things to yourself. i'm human too. if you hate me, don't talk to me. don't say things like "better than talking to you" because it hurts like fug.


i'm blabbering like a blurp fish. i don't know what i'm saying. i feel vulnerable. i feel my actions and words being scrutinised by people. i miss the bestfriend. at least the bestfriend's the one person i know who *hearts* me. sobs...


//girl, stop crying

yay. (=
i'm going out with my girlfriend.
yay.
i'm elated.
yay!
see the loss of vocab?
yay!
hmmm..
YAY!

blah blah blah.
BLAbbering.
blabber bloober day.
enough of the blabber.
i'm sane again.
shall not allow myself to slip into depression for Stupid reasons.
i am glory.
glory is strong.
yeah.

back from chalet, very boring. and people like to make up lots of their own creative stories. so be it. i'm not tht cheap la, comeon.


movie yesterday. best friend. her. LOVE, ACTUALLY double meaning. go figure.


long sleep.
news. good? bad? i don't know.
lost
/long run
/drinks
/sticks
/tears
anyone wants to drink themselves drunk??? call me.

everyone seems to be telling me that they're dying from boredom.
am i the only one who's been enjoying my sudden attained freedom? heeheee.
coz i am i am i am!!!
bleahs =p

CLICKY HERE PLS
this has become my lastest fav site. haha

i NEED a money tree.
God, please sprinkle money from the heavens above..
all i want for christmas is...
*$32.90 for the white short sleeved top
*$19.00 for the projectshop top
*$26.90 for the white halter top
*$65.00 for the google denim skirt
*$i-don't-know-how-much for the necklace with the huge square pendant
*$486 for the stardust necklace from lee hwa jewellery.
*$14.90 for the pink/darkpink bling bling braclet
that is all i want for christmas! it's not alot! give them to me!


give it to me baby, uh huh, uh huh

*buRP* gl-ory is feeling really happy today. all filled up with eggie bread. the perfect meal to start a wonderful day of shopping shopping shopping shopping (but window shopping this time SIGH). came back from a chalet 2 days ago, and i'm off to another one tomorrow.

many things done since the last time i blogged.

i dyed my hair



i went for MJDDS chalet at




stayed at NTUC Sentosa beach resort,




spent some time on the nice sandy beaches of Sentosa,




attempted to indulge in some lesbianism haha...,




played alot of bridge, dai dee, (oh yes and lots of BEAR GAME)




and took lots of photos

the pretty lao puo



the ex



the darling Mama!!



the bestest grandson in the world,



and the BESTFRIEND



whom i really really miss so very very much.